Reality Premises

I’m sure that you are as excited as I am about the new Shaquille O’Neal reality television show, “Shaq’s Big Challenge,” which debuts tonight on ABC. O’Neal, never the slimmest man in the NBA, has decided to lend his vast knowledge of weight gain and loss to a group of children who are struggling with there own weight problems. And hilarity ensues.

But it got me to thinking, what other current or former NBA stars would be able to pull off a reality show? What would the subjects be? Let’s dig into the ABC archives to find a few shows that didn’t quite make the cut:

SHAWN PATROL – It’s ‘To Sir, With Love’ for a whole new generation when Shawn Kemp tutors a group of high school students on the dangers of premartial sex. But what will Shawn say when it’s revealed that the group of kids aren’t just any group of kids – they’re his own!

OAK TOWN – Charles Oakley throws his weight behind a project that aims to help kids in trouble with drugs learn the dangers of marijuana use. Expect many guest stars.

VLADE’S VALLEY – What do you do when someone pushes you? Former NBA star Vlade Divac says don’t push pack, flop! Divac’ shows a bunch of 8-year-olds tormented by bullies that the best revenge is to always make it look like the other kid started it. Special guest appearance from Karl Malone.

ROBERT’S BIG RIDE – Lots of people will tell you that working hard and buckling down is the surest way to climb the ladder of success, but NBA great Robert Horry teaches a group of struggling middle-management types that glomming onto already successful organizations is the sure-fire way to reach the top. “Don’t start at the bottom and work your way up,” instructs Horry. “Start at the top and just hang out!”